New School Year, New Me

I am entering into my last and final year at Texas State University. I will be graduating in May of 2017. Sitting here typing this article I am thinking about the change I endured over the last three years. Change was the word I took hold of as I prepared for the upcoming school year. I declared that I want this year to be my best yet. So, before heading off to my leadership retreat I made a few subtle changes. I highlighted my hair, got new different glasses, and a few new articles of clothing. In doing these things I was a bit scared. I was nervous of what others would think about these new changes. Yet, I shouldn’t have. Those around me gave me compliments, and those that are close to me gave me good feedback on why a little change is good. All the feedback fueled me with a bit more confidence in the small changes that I was making. Then, at my leadership retreat I learned a lot about spiritual change. I was shown how I needed to evaluate my relationship with Christ. And during that week retreat I made some big steps toward a better relationship with Christ. However, not only did my relationship with Christ get evaluated, but also my relationship with myself. I spent some time with God that truly changed the way I thought about certain situations. Following those times with God, I spent some time with my mentor. Her and I spent a lot of time talking about my past and how I got to where I am now. We noticed that through it all God was growing and changing me from the inside out. She told me that she liked the changes that were taking place in me, and how proud of me she was. It got me thinking that change isn’t such a bad thing. At least small changes. Changes that can lead to a better you. Changes that are healthy for your future. 

It's funny how people experience incredible transformations as they get older. As I am going into my final year of college all I can do is reminisce over the last three years and how much I have grown. As I'm line dancing in front of a group of students I realize that I never would have done this three years ago. My freshman year when I attended my freshman orientation I had a lot of fears, and didn't want to embarrass myself in front of my fellow classmates by dancing in front of them, but now it seems i’ve tossed those fears to the wind. Before my senior year began I joined about 80 of my fellow classmates for a week of being role models for the incoming freshman at the school. However, before that we had four days of training, and within that training we had time to just let loose and have fun. Every day from the second training day on our leaders played music that was to try and get all of us out of our seats and dancing. The point of the music was to get all of us energized for the day. What makes me chuckle to myself is the fact that out of 25 people in my group i’m the only one that got up and danced. What makes the moment even more ironic is that three years ago I wouldn’t have been the one trying to get my group out of their seat. I would be the one holding back because of different excuses. The best thing about it is how freeing it is to be the one not holding back. It’s funny how God changes us using little things. He has grown my confidence over the last several years. He has helped me and will continue to help me to grow in how I view myself. He has used my fraternity to help put me back in front of people performing, and he has used my friends to grow my skills in dancing. I can see that those little things have helped me mature in who I am. 

Furthermore, when I think about change in the Bible I think about the culture of the biblical times before Jesus was born. During those times the Jewish people had their laws and customs that were rarely challenged. That whenever one of Gods children tried to stand against jewish law they were casted away because of what they believed. Take for example Christ’s life. The world was a different place before He walked the earth. God sent him so that he could show the world how they should live, and who they should live for. When Jesus came onto this earth things began to shift, people began to change. Christ changed the world when he was here, and after he left. He showed people that having faith in God and following him can have an everlasting impact on not just the people around you, but on yourself as well.  He showed us that change can be a good thing.

Change can be hard whether big or small yet on the other hand the chaos of change can lead to dreams and passions you never knew you had. It can also lead you to places you’ve never been before. The chorus of Sanctus Real’s song “Whatever You’re Doing (Something Heavenly)” worships God even in the the chaos of life and the change. The lyrics read “ Whatever you’re doing inside of me/ it feels like choas/ somehow there’s peace/ It’s hard to surrender/ to what I can’t see/ but i’m giving into something heavenly.” No matter the change, no matter the fear that seems to be growing inside you, God is bringing these things into your life for a reason. Seek him as the change comes, and he will help you find the peace and comfort you are looking for.